Ending the Weary Search

I always wake up depleted after a Searching Dream. That’s what I’ve taken to calling the nightly dramas I have so often, Searching Dreams. It’s almost impossible to explain them to a second party, but I think I’m supposed to try.

My searching dreams always have a destination I urgently need to reach— only I’m unable to make any forward progress because the setting and the circumstances keep changing. I may start out on a bike that morphs into a car, or a motorcycle that becomes a boat, but every vehicle I find myself in will inevitably fail and force me to change modes of transportation about the time the road loops back, detours, or washes out completely, leaving me to find yet another game plan as my destination lies so tantalizing near yet out of reach. These changing but similar scenarios loop throughout the dream, which may be minutes or even seconds, but it feels like hours. As you might imagine, they wear me out. I used to ask God to take them away but I don’t anymore.

Some time ago, after another long night of getting nowhere fast and waking up exhausted, I decided that instead of asking God to stop the dreams, I’d ask Him for understanding concerning them. There may be a ton hundred of qualified psychologists out there reading these words who would love to take a stab at that, but I want to tell you what I’ve come to believe.

I believe Father allows me to feel in the night, all of the frustration, anxiety, fear, and exhaustion that others feel in the day as they search for satisfaction in this world apart from a relationship with Christ, all that my heart might be burdened for theirs. I say, if these dreams compel me to continue sharing His love and proclaim His goodness with the world, it’s an honor to give up some sleep for the One who gave us His life. Whatever you think you’re searching for, what you need is Jesus.

Hugs, Shellie