Full Moons Can Be Dangerous, Experience Speaking

Sometimes what could’ve happened can be funnier than what did, especially if the potential for major embarrassment has been avoided and all is well. But I suppose I should explain.

As a general rule, I’m up before the Beloved Farmer leaves for work. However, on the day the following events transpired I had overslept and the Farmer, being a kind-hearted fella, chose not to wake me. He figured I needed my rest. Some have suggested I also need a keeper. The idea has merit, but back to my story.

Phil had mentioned needing to change the oil in my car, so when I noticed my vehicle was gone and Phil’s truck wasn’t, I naturally assumed he had taken it for servicing. Sometime later I was standing in the front yard with a water hose making rainbows and watering my flowers when Phil pulled down our driveway in my car. He honked and I waved.

Brace yourself.

I also considered mooning him. You read that correctly. Right there in the light of day. Mind you, I saw my fair share of full moons back in high school, but I’ve never actually participated in such an exhibition.

My sole excuse for considering public indecency at this point in my life is that I love hearing Phil make about five syllables out of my name and I could already hear him saying, “Shellllllllllllllie, what in the world were you thinking? God and everybody could’ve seen you!”  I can’t count the number of times Phil has made five syllables out of my name in the past forty something years, and you don’t have time for me to list the many reasons I’ve given him. It’s a lot.

That said, I didn’t have time to act on my daring impulse before Phil pulled around the corner of the house and out of sight. Moments later, I was presented with a second opportunity when the Beloved Farmer came back around the house in his truck and headed out the drive. By that time, reason should’ve prevailed, but the Beloved Farmer was waving at me through the truck’s dark window and reason wasn’t getting a vote.

There I was with the garden hose in one hand and the other hand on my shorts when the window suddenly lowered. Please put yourself in my flipflops when fate revealed that it wasn’t my husband at the wheel, but one of the men who works for him on our farm. This fine employee also serves as Worship Leader at our church— and I had almost mooned him. Mind you, I hadn’t been planning a full moon. It was going to be more of a half-moon, or maybe just a little crescent, but the damage would’ve been done and from what I understand the fall out would’ve been considerable.

I know that because I told it. Oh, you knew I would.

I told the family, and Jonathan the Worship Leader, and Jonathan’s wife, and our associate pastor, and the other guys on the farm, and well, anyone else who would listen. We have laughed and cringed thinking about what could’ve been.

Phil and Jonathan are pretty sure they wouldn’t have been able to make eye contact ever again, which means Jonathan, father of three, would possibly be out looking for work. And none of us think this would’ve been a positive development for our church. You can’t have word getting out that the Women’s Ministry leader mooned the Worship Leader without people talking. This is not what the Lord meant by turning the other cheek. We’re sure of it.  

That’s it for now, folks. Take care, and remember, all’s well that ends well…so to speak.  

Hugs,
Shellie

P.S. In other news, Seizing the Good Life released since the last time I wrote to you! Whoo, hoo! I shared a fun little video the day before it hit the book shelves:  Three Ways Launching a Book is Like Birthing a Baby! I hope you enjoy. Laughter is God’s medicine! (Oh, and do hit subscribe on Youtube and then, consider sharing with your friends and family. I love this community and I truly believe the more the merrier!