Pinning it on Papa

Hello folks, it’s a pleasure to welcome y’all back to my porch. Have a seat and let’s chat…~smile~

Remember my telling y’all about our family’s history of pulling practical jokes on our children? Well, my Papa was a major player. One night, back on Bull Run Road, it fell to my middle sister Rhonda to carry the scraps out after supper. (City folks: that means feeding leftovers to the yard dogs.) Rhonda, who was already a scaredy-cat sort of kid, had barely exited the back door when Papa threw a towel over his head and lit out the front. Rhonda was standing beneath the faint glow of our sole light pole when she spotted him and heard his spooky moan. Bless her heart. The girl was a grown woman before she went outside alone after dark, if indeed she ever has.

With me, Papa played a different game. It wasn’t enough that I had a speech impediment. Papa enjoyed complicating matters by twisting my words. If I said something about the “light bulb in the pump shed,” he’d say, “What’s a bite lulb in the shump ped?!” Of course, I’d protest. “I said “light bulb in the pump shed!” After several rounds of this I would inevitably say “shump ped” when I meant to say “pump shed” and everyone would laugh, except me— and Mama. She always took my side.

I mention the last story mainly to set up the next one. The other night my beloved husband was keeping me awake sawing on some serious logs. All married couples have their signals. If I poke Phil in the ribs he usually turns over on his side and the snoring stops. Not so this time. It went on endlessly. Finally, I shook him awake. “Baby,” I said, “Stop snoring.” Phil looked at me in pure confusion. “What?”

I repeated myself, “Stop snorning!” “WHAT?!” Phil had either gone completely deaf or he wasn’t fully awake.

“STOP SNORING!” I hollered, only that’s when I realized that I wasn’t saying “Stop snoring.” I was saying, “Snop Storing.”

Poor Phil. I let him go back to sleep and I tried to do the same. For the record, Papa, I’m pinning this one on you.

Hugs,
Shellie