Seniors Rock

Hello folks, let’s chat… Since today’s porch chat could be less than advantageous to the old speaking career if it were misconstrued, I feel compelled to open with a disclaimer of sorts. The ham in me loves speaking to all kinds of audiences in all types of venues. So, even though I’ll be sending some love out to one special group, I do hope the rest of y’all will keep the phone ringing. I’d love to chat with your book club, church group, school, hunting camp, or civic organization. Okay, I was joking about the hunting camp. I wanted to see if the men were listening. Breathe guys. And now, if we’re good, I’ll move on.

When it comes to audiences, seniors rock, and I didn’t even have to reach for that pun. It was there for the pickings. Sure, there are challenges, but anything worthwhile has challenges. Recently, I was preparing to speak to a large group of my Mississippi elders when this charming older woman nailed one of the larger ones with the type of characteristic honesty that I find so endearing.

“Are you going to be our speaker?” she asked.

“Yes, ma’am!”

“Great,” she said. “I’m looking forward to it. But, honey, don’t get your feelings hurt if we nod off about fifteen minutes in. We do that a lot.”

I assured her I wouldn’t take it personally. And I didn’t, when she did.

With my penchant for collecting stories, I’ve learned to ask around at these events for the group’s Trouble Maker. Every crowd has one. The Trouble Maker is usually male and can be counted on to have as many tales and one-liners ready as someone else you know—if not more.

I spotted the Trouble Maker that day almost as soon as I arrived. He wasted no time pulling out one of his best lines. “Mrs. Shellie,” he said, politely, “I’m well into my eighties and I can do anything I could do in my thirties.”

I told him that was pretty impressive!

“Not really,” he said. “It tells you how worthless I was in my thirties.”

You have to love that! Y’all take it easy and drop me a note if you want to chat!

Hugs, Shellie