Something Stinks in the Sleep Study

Hello folks! Welcome back to All Things Southern. I do so love to see the gang get together on the porch. Have a seat, and let’s chat…~smile~

There’s a new study out reporting that southerners have more sleeping issues and daytime fatigue than any other area of our fine country. According to the University of Pennsylvania we are: Sleepless in the South. Perhaps it’s just me, but I’m always a tad skeptical of these big announcements. So, quite naturally, The Belle of All Things Southern did her own little study, and by that I mean I Googled the findings and I talked it over with my friend, Paulette— a conversation that can qualify as extensive and exhaustive research, all by itself.

So, here’s what I found out. The data was collected via the telephone, by voluntary participants. Aha! “That explains everything,” I told Paulette.

“Of course it does!” Paulette said, emphatically. “But, what does it mean, exactly?”

I chose to answer her question with a question. It’s a little thing we behavioral expert types do. “Tell me, Paulette, what would happen if someone called your mama on the phone and asked her how she slept the night before, hmmm?”

“She’d talk their ear off!” Paulette said. “I’m telling you, she’d break the night down, detail by detail. She’d go on and on, and— I see what you mean.”

In the event you still aren’t with me, I’ll elaborate. Making sure someone made it through the night is a time-tested sign of love and concern in the South. I can’t speak for those who aren’t from around here, but the southern people who answered that call would’ve been touched to know that someone had reached out and cared. It’s possible their children are still hearing about it.

One of the research associates said the takeaway message from this study is that we should try to decipher these sleep patterns in order to help those in the highest risk areas. Perhaps. But do keep in mind that the easiest answer is usually the right one. Seriously, these academic folks need to put me on the payroll. It’s gotten to where I have to explain everything.

Hugs,
Shellie