“Breaking Curses at the County Fair”

I’m not even supposed to know this, which means there’s a solid chance I’m not supposed to share it either, but hey, I’m pretty sure the statue of limitations has passed. Besides, it’s all in fun and I did change the names. The story is set in one of our neighboring parishes. A couple of years ago they had a county fair roll into town, a good old-fashioned county fair, complete with kiddie rides, Ferris wheels and cotton candy. People came in for miles around and as, they say, a good time was had by all. Or almost all, word is that some folks may have had a slightly different agenda. My friend, Rena, told me that she heard this from her friend, Susan, who heard it from— oh, well, I don’t reckon that’s important. Here it is. Some folks are saying that Martin Smith had a pretty interesting question for the traveling fortuneteller.

It should be noted that Martin thought he was flying under the radar, but please. It’s a small town. He should’ve known better. There are always ears to hear in a small town, but Martin’s never been the sharpest knife in the drawer. They say Martin looked both ways when he approached the fortune teller’s booth and lowered his voice. “Are you a real honest-to-goodness fortune teller?” he asked the woman. “I mean, do you know about curses and all?”

When the fortune teller nodded, Martin asked her if she could remove a “curse” he’d been living with for the last 40 years. The fortuneteller eyed the man’s wallet and tried to buy a little time, “Well, maybe,” she said mysteriously, “but you’ll have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you.”

“Oh, that’s not a problem,” Martin said. “I remember it like it was yesterday. The fellow’s exact words were: I now pronounce you man and wife.”

~Shellie