Selfies Make Your Butt Look Big

Hello folks, let’s chat… Several days ago, I was having coffee with my girlfriends when someone brought up the subject of Selfies. In the event you aren’t familiar with the term, “Selfies” is the name given to the endless self-portrait photographs being posted on social media, compliments of our ever present smart phones.

For a clue as to how I feel about selfies, I offered the girls the title of a fun little speech I’ll be giving in West Virginia this spring. I was tentatively calling it, “Selfies Make Your Butt Look Big– and other timely advice from the Belle of All Things Southern”.

That was before my educational moment.

See, when I first came up with that title, my BFF said, “That’s funny, Shellie, but I don’t get it. Who’s sharing pictures of their butts?”

I told Rhonda she was missing the point, that it was simply my way of discouraging the selfie craze. I’m now being forced to rethink the whole thing. I created that title back when I was hopelessly naive, before that aforementioned coffee visit, before I learned that the selfie is so last year. Let everyone with an ounce of social grace remaining brace yourselves. The new buzz word is belfie, as in women posting self-portraits of their behinds, aka “belfies”. So, the answer to Rhonda’s question is a lot of people. And, apparently, the bigger the bum the better.

I promptly called my like-minded author friend River Jordan to get her opinion on the belfie. I told River about this misguided female on Instagram who is famous because her belfies have gone viral. She has millions of followers. Or rather, her bottom has millions of followers. She never shows her face, which tells you something. I don’t know what because this whole thing is making my brain hurt.

By the way, River said she’s ready for common sense to go viral. I wholeheartedly concur. This would be one small step towards making that happen. Fellow belles, for the sake of all that is good and decent, help us out and repost this chat. We’re feeling outnumbered.

Hugs, Shellie