Budgeting Woes, We All Have ‘Em

Jerry was sitting in his accountant’s waiting room, waiting for his appointment when an old college acquaintance walked in. The two of them shook hands and made a little small talk while the other fellow signed the waiting list. Then he sat down next across from Jerry in the tiny room. The men had never been that close, but seeing as how their knees were practically touching, Jerry said he felt compelled to make small talk.

“So, how’s business?” Jerry asked, politely. “You became a doctor, if I remember correctly.”
“You do, and it’s okay, but I’m still headed to the poor house. My wife spends money faster than I can make it.”

Jerry was a little surprised with this terse bit of TMI, too much information, but he didn’t show it. “I was married to a woman like that once,” he said. “I couldn’t bring it home before it was gone. Mine spent it on clothes. She didn’t like to wear anything more than once. She had more clothes than one of those Hollywood movie stars.”

“My wife doesn’t buy a lot of clothes,” the other fella said.
“Oh.” They sat in silence until Jerry tried again. “My buddy’s ex-wife was always buying new furniture.”
“Mine doesn’t.” The guy said.
“Right,” Jerry said. “So, what’s the deal? She like for you to take her on those fancy vacations?”
“Nope. She pretty much likes staying at home.”

By now, Jerry was downright curious. “If she’s reasonable with the clothing budget, conservative about decorating and tight with the food and entertainment budget, what exactly is the problem?”

The other guy groaned. “Miscellaneous,” he said. “The woman has a miscellaneous category that could choke a horse!”

~Shellie